Fixing the Broken
by starglow71
Summary: AU. Cas is defused by God and given new duties, after fixing Sam of course. He desperately wants to be forgiven and be their friend again, Will he be able to to get them to and what will it take before they will? Character Death, sort of. Schmoop.


The New God, Castiel, was very confused.

One minute he was in a building with his old nemesis's remains at his feet, giving Dean and the others an ultimatum and the next, he's in a hallway that just kept going on and on, full of dim light, sitting in front of a glowing old man, looking disapprovingly at him, but still with love.

"Father?" Castiel gasped, too surprised to do anything else.

"Son." The old man said, "You did almost screw the pooch, _didn't _you?" Castiel went to speak but God held up a hand, opening a glowing portal and touched Castiel's head. "Open up and say '_ah_'."

Castiel just looked at him puzzled. "Do as I say, say '_ah' _as the mortal doctors say." Castiel didn't argue he opened his mouth and said, _ah_. Sure enough, black forms shot out of his mouth and were tunneled into the white portal. Castiel could have sworn he heard growling and roaring in the black forms.

"Now we can talk." God said and smiled in relief.

"What were they? The black things." Castiel asked, they had felt dirty inside him, like they were trying to get out or something.

"Leviathans, demons from when I first created creation. I hadn't figured out how to destroy them yet so I created purgatory and locked them in there. Never got around to killing them. The other evil souls are back in there, too. I have relocked it and moved it, can't have Crowley unlocking it again. On the other hand, I have to deal with _that_ demon. Can't risk him trying this crap again, _little over-ambitious limey bastard_!" God growled and even Castiel shivered at the wrath in that voice. "Give that job to the boys when they're talking to you again, would ya?"

"What? You mean Dean and…" Castiel paled at the thought.

"Yes, the Winchesters and the Singer man. I _like_ them; they can get him, I'm sure of it." God said and smiled. "I also have a job for you."

Castiel shifted nervously in his seat. "What job? I sucked in Purgatory and killed my brother. Not exactly good Heavenly worker material here." Castiel looked down in shame.

"So you tried to kill your brother? Yeah, been done before, fixed it, don't sweat it. Wait, _sweat it_, let it remind of you of the perils of working with demons and evil and don't do it again, or I'll just smite you out of existence, okay?" God said smiling but meaning every word.

"Yes, sir." Castiel gulped and nodded.

"Your new job is simple. You take Michael's job. Like you thought you would at the start of this mess. And all it entails." God said and Castiel had a feeling this didn't bode well for him.

"What were his duties?" Castiel had to ask, he had a bad feeling about this.

"Glad you asked. Protecting Heaven and Earth and…guardian of Purgatory." God said and Castiel paled. He had _known_ he wouldn't like this and he'd been right. "Do you really think you're the first angel who considered unlocking it, _seriously_?"

"Oh." Actually, _Yea_h, he _had_ thought that. But then God probably already _knew_ that.

"Michael considered it and tried. Which is how he got the job. Which is why you now have the job. The Keeper of Purgatory has to know what's in there to understand what they are keeping in and it also gives the keeper a dire need to keep the damn place locked, too. Do you understand why it needs to be kept locked now, don't you?" God smiled and Castiel nodded sharply, afraid. He quaked in fear of what he _knew _was in there and dearly _never_ wanted it opened again, _ever_! He'd _kill_ the next person or being to try to, _on the spot_! That place should _never_ be opened. He _knew_ what was in its deepest reaches and _even he wished he didn't_ but now that he did, he could _never_ see it being opened. His nightmares would be _haunte_d by the creatures, the _Leviathans_, that hid in its deepest prisons for the rest of his existence at it was! Which, he now realized, was why he got the job of making sure that _didn't_ happen, _crap_!

"_Yes_, oh, _yes_! I'll kill anyone who _tries_, no matter _who_ they are." Castiel swore, _he'd keep that damn place locked and hid forever, and beyond that, if there was such a thing. _He should _never_ have opened it to begin with; he'd almost _destroyed_ the world. "So I am the Protector of Heaven and Earth, too?" Okay, this scared him, too. Big promotion and one he definitely _wasn't_ equipped for power wise. "Why? I'm nowhere near as powerful as Michael was… again."

"Yes, you are…now. I let you keep a measure of the power the souls from Purgatory gave you. More than enough to take his place. You just wanted to protect the humans and the Earth and Heaven from war and the apocalypse, you dedicated yourself to it and fought tooth and nail to do what it took to achieve that goal. You will still be doing that, but with the authority to do it now, keep order in Heaven and don't get cocky. I may not always stay there in Heaven but I do always know what's going on there, I'm always watching, ready to intervene if needed." God explained and Castiel bowed his head.

"I'll do it, Father, I'll do the duties you have given me but…how do I face them now? I messed up so bad." Castiel hung his head in shame and wanted to cry, feeling so worried now. He was afraid to face his former friends again.

"Not beyond forgiveness. They still love you. You just have to prove you've changed. You can do it. I will send Gabriel to help you." God said hugging his worried son. "Let's go, son."

"Wait, where are we? It feels odd here." Castiel had to ask.

"Why, Purgatory, of course. The upper level, of course. Where lost souls wait to move on from. It's a temporary place for the transitioning souls. Where all decisions are made for the soul's destination are decided. It's where the Keeper must decide to accept his duties or not. Do you accept them?" God asked, it would seal him to the place, make it tied to the new archangel at his Grace level. He would never be able to stop Guarding it or Keeping it from being opened.

"I accept all the duties you have given me, Father." Castiel said but caught his father's look.

"Word it exactly, son. It was to be worded exactly." God said and Castiel nodded.

"I, Castiel, Archangel of the Lord, do solemnly swear to take on the duties as Keeper and Guardian of Purgatory and swear to keep it locked and never allow anyone to open it ever again, on pain of death." Castiel said and he felt the place tying itself to him now. He could feel where every soul was locked and how to open each cell. He could feel everything, right now to the very last level of it, where the Leviathans were… again. He could feel his mind checking every lock mentally and making sure they each were locked even as he stood there, whether he wanted to feel it or now. Purgatory radar and radio running through his head 24/7 now.

He also could feel Heaven in his head now, knew it and what was going on there as if he was there in person. Every angel and archangel and what they were doing at any moment, known in an instant if he focused on them even with the barest thought. Balthazar was…working his blade and joking with another angel. Gabriel was…on Earth, nearby. Wow, he really was doing Michael's job now.

"So, we go speak with the others now? How could they ever forgive me now? I broke Sam!" Castiel sighed worried again, he hated the thought his friends hated him now. It hurt his heart when he thought of how badly he'd betrayed them.

"So, fix it." God said softly, and smiled, "It may not be as hard as you think, son. Those boys and their father are pretty forgiving if you really want to earn it, trust me. I created them that way for a reason, different than any Hunters ever born; infinitely forgiving, infinitely more capable of love than any souls I ever made. Give them a chance, son. Here's a hint, just heal Sam first, do a mind walk with him, join him in his noggin and heal him from the inside so no wall is needed. It's the only way to fix him for good. The wall can never be rebuilt but Sam's soul can be healed, if you help him do it." God smiled again, "Gabriel is waiting to help with that, we have to return soon. Don't forget to give them the mission I gave them, kill Crowley or he will just try to open it again now that he knows how. You are its keeper, you will keep it closed, never opened again."

He touched Castiel now and he was suddenly standing in front of his cowering friends and Dean was pleading with him to stop. He could feel Sam behind him with the blade as well.

"Don't do this, Cas, You know it's wrong!" Dean pleaded, eyes begging his friend, trying to see if he was in there still.

First, Castiel turned to Sam and swiftly removed the blade from his hand, touching his head, making him sleep. Sam fell to the ground asleep now.

"What did you do!" Dean now growled and Gabriel appeared behind the men and touched their shoulders. Both men turned to their old friend and jumped in surprise now.

"He put him to sleep so he could fix him." Gabriel explained, moving to stand in front of them now. "Father has removed the souls from him and put them back where they belong. He is now Michael's successor and Keeper of Purgatory. He will keep anyone from ever opening it again. Trust _me_, even if you can't bring yourselves to trust him, _please_?" Gabriel pleaded and Dean finally relented, Bobby looked a little less suspicious.

"That true, Cas? You gonna keep that place locked? You can fix Sam?" Dean dared to trust his former friend one last time, "Not a God anymore?"

"Yes, it's true. Just an archangel. Look, I know what I did. I cannot rebuild the wall, but I can fix it. I have to go into his mind and do it though. No wall but, really heal his soul, his mind will be fine after this." Castiel explained.

"Fine, then take me with you." Dean said solemnly, "Just because I'm giving you a chance to fix him, doesn't mean I trust you again, especially in my brother's very shattered mind right now. I go or you don't." He meant it, Cas would have to prove himself again, and this was a good start. "Well?"

"Dean? Are you sure this is the best idea?" Bobby said uncertainly, not liking this idea at all.

"Yes, it's the best one I got. No way am I trusting Mr. Backstabby McAngel over here in my brother's head alone! Offense meant, Cas. You hurt me, and you fucking hurt him! You have to earn our trust back. Start with this." Dean said sadly eying his former friend, who looked like he wanted to cry. He looked so sorry Dean wanted to forgive him right then, but Dean couldn't, not yet. Maybe after fixing Sam, he might start.

"Okay. You can come. We need a safe place to lay our bodies while we do this. Bobby's place should work, once he removes the angel wards, that is. Gabriel and I can't get in if you don't." Castiel suggested and Gabriel sighed sadly, rolling his eyes at his brother. He already knew this answer. So did Cas.

"Hell, no!" Bobby growled, eyes hard. "No fucking way. You screwed us over. It's a motel room or nothing." Bobby could tell Castiel was being sincere here but then he had seemed just as sincere when he'd been stabbing them in their backs, too. He _so_ wasn't getting anywhere near his house, fuck that! Dean wasn't the only one the angel, no, Archangel had to prove himself to.

"Fine, a motel room. Do you already have one paid for?" Castiel sighed and Bobby nodded. "Take us there, Gabriel, bring the car, fix it if you can, please?" Gabriel nodded, smiling softly at his repentant brother. He would forgive him now since forgiveness was going to be in short supply for the time being; for quite a while now.

"Sure, Cas, I can do that. I forgive you, even if they can't right now. I'll be in your corner, bro. You need a person there now because their forgiveness will be hard earned but worth it, don't give up on it, okay?" He could tell Castiel was breaking a little, so sorry and yet feeling like they could never forgive him, wanting to just fix Sam and run off to Heaven after, to escape their anger. He would never be forgiven if he did that, not the way he needed to be. These humans were their friends, their best friends really, both his and Cas's. He had to keep trying, Cas just had to too! "You can do this."

"I'll fix Sam and see. If not, I'll just leave." Castiel said sadly and reached for Bobby's head and stopped. "Just think it and we'll be there. I won't touch you." Castiel promised and Bobby nodded, glaring slightly but also puzzled by the man's shy behavior now. He seemed sorry. The question was, was he really?

"Yes, I really am sorry." Castiel said sadly, heart heavy. "Just get us to the room so I can fix him." He closed his eyes and Bobby thought of their room. Then they stood in the middle of it. He approached Sam who now was carried between Bobby and Dean but stopped, afraid they would misinterpret the action.

Both men got the unconscious man to the bed on the left and Castiel motioned to Dean, "Lie beside him, take his hand. Here, Bobby." He held his Archangel blade out now and Bobby took it looking confused. "I know you don't trust me. I'm really am so damn sorry I did any of this to you guys. I know you may never forgive me but I will leave this with you as a sign of my good faith. If I screw you over, feel free to kill me." Bobby looked at the man now and looked…concerned?

"You really are sorry, ain't ya, Cas?" Bobby felt himself softening some, yeah, the man was sorry. But could he fix Sam? That was the question.

"Yes, I am." Castiel said softly and touched both boys heads. "Wish me luck." He said then turned into a white glowing form and pulled light from Dean, and got brighter. Then he flowed into Sam's head and body, making him glow and then just left the boys sleeping forms on the bed with him nowhere in sight.

"He's in there." Gabriel said from behind him and eyed the blade in his hand. "I see he left a good faith offering."

"Yes, he did." Bobby queried, "He up to this mind walk thing? Can he do it?"

"Yes, it's in his power now. It's up to Sam if it works though." Gabriel said monitoring them now. "It is a big risk to them both when he does this. It _will_ kill both brothers if it doesn't work." Gabriel said softly, worried, "Dean shouldn't have done this. If Sam dies, he'll die, too. That _is_ a guarantee."

"It's the way they are, twisted as it is, if one goes, the other would naturally have to follow. They don't really function well without each other. Those two are so tied together, in every way possible, so fucked up and wrapped around each other's heads, that they could never be without each other for very long. It's their natures really. When one hurts, like Sam does right now, Dean does, too. However, this could work to our advantage." Bobby said, knowing it was true and accepting it the way he always had, whole heartedly and happily. He just wanted his boys back, no matter how twisted together they were or how close they got. They were his boys, he loved them, and he wanted them back, healthy and whole.

"How's that?" Gabriel had to ask.

"Well, if Sam doesn't trust Cas, he'll definitely trust his brother. It could help him heal faster knowing Dean's there." Bobby said feeling better now. Dean would help his brother. It's what he did.

"Bobby, I need you to try really hard to forgive him. Cas I mean. If you guys don't try, or you resist it too hard, he'll run, man. I know you don't see the bad there but you don't see the whole picture. He's breaking under the guilt, Bobby. If you push it too hard, it will break him, my brother may be an archangel now but he's still _Cas_, he still values you guys as his best friends. Yes, he betrayed you, but he's willing to _try_. But he's also very human in some ways, too, Bobby. He's scared and sick for what he's done. He wants to run after he heals Sam, thinks you hate him now. Do you?" Gabriel asked, needing to know what to expect after this finished for his brother.

Bobby considered that. Did he hate Cas? He was angry, felt betrayed, was resentful, but was there hate in there? The more he considered it, the more he knew better. No, there was no hate. He didn't hate Cas. But could he let those other feelings go so easily, could he forgive him that much? They could lose him as their friend, sure, he'd fucked up, made all the wrong decisions, chose demons over them. Well, Sam had done that, too. They'd forgiven him, so could they forgive Cas for the same thing? He was an angel, he should have known better. He'd warned them against it often enough. But he was also the most human angel they had ever met and he'd been like a brother to them. So, could he forgive him? Could he see past his anger and betrayal enough to give the fragile angel a chance?

Bobby sighed and looked at Gabriel now, shaking his head. "No, we don't hate him. We're just feeling betrayed. I don't want him to leave that way, after this. We'd never get a chance to be his friends again if he does. He runs and we lose him forever, just like we would have if we hadn't given Sam one." He sighed softly, "I'll forgive him. He's taking a big risk helping Sam this way. I see our friend in him again when he does this. So, yeah, I forgive him. Hell, I think I may have already. I'm just too worried about them to think about it."

"Well, _damn_ it, Singer, _think_ about it! I _need_ to know if he's going to run or not. You don't try, he fucking _will_!" Gabriel growled and Bobby jumped, resolving to try.

"Fine, I forgive him. I already have! You happy now?" Bobby said in frustration, hating to admit this part, especially this part.

"Yes, actually. It will help. If you can forgive him, then Dean will be able to, too." Gabriel said smiling easier now. Cas stood a chance now, a slim one, but still, a chance.

"Well, here's hoping this works. If not, we're screwed." Bobby said and sat down to watch to see if this worked. Gabriel joined him. Both worried.

Xxxxxxxxx

Sam was running down a street, a dark street. "Sam!" a voice called, a familiar voice. A loved voice. "Damn it, Sam, stop!" Sam stopped and saw Dean running toward him, looking relieved. A shot rang out and they ducked behind the Impala. "Stay down, Sam. Let him do this."

"Who's him?" Sam asked confused now, Dean felt…odd, like he shouldn't be here. And who was this other guy? "What is going on? Who is Sam?"

"You are. You are Sam Winchester, my brother, well, a piece of him. I think the part with a soul. Your Wall got broke, by Cas. He was wrong to do it, yes, I know, but he seems to think this will help you. I think it will help, please, Sam, let us try?"

Sam felt the confusion shifting in his mind, sliding aside a little. He saw a flash of an alley, a woman dying, Bobby and Dean. Dean. Dean was his brother." You're my brother, Dean." He flinched at the memory and heard his name spoken, knew it was his own. "I'm Sam." He fell into Dean's arms and held his head in pain now, flashes coming more frequently now. Cas, Castiel. Touched him, the wall breaking. He was burning, felt and saw Hell, the cage. Felt so raw and agonizing. Saw what he'd done without a soul, felt shame. "He broke my Wall. Castiel. He said he'd fix it later if you would back off." Sam cringed as the same angel stood before him now and screamed in terror. Dean held him tight to him, body between him and Cas. Cas held…him? A coldly smiling…Sam?

"I'm so sorry, Sam, I know this is hard to understand but I need you to focus." Castiel said softly and went to touch him, flinching visibly when Dean pulled Sam away. "Please, I won't hurt you but I need you to try to let me fix you, please, Sam? Dean, you said you'd let me do this. You promised."

"Sam? What do you want me to do?" Dean looked at his trembling brother now.

"What happens if we don't…let you help?" Sam asked, a bad feeling in his gut now.

"Then you fall apart, your separate parts fight for supremacy. Hell and the cage get you, and you die, along with Dean. He tied himself to you when he insisted on coming along. I was going to do this alone." Castiel said sadly, "Please, I'm so sorry I did this to you but I can't build another wall for you. It would have fallen anyway. I can heal your soul, Sam, if you let me. I can fix you forever, make you the way you were…before you entered the cage. Once I do this, I'll…leave you alone forever if you still hate me."

He didn't want to leave or run. He wanted forgiven. He wanted his friends back. "There's this empty place, right here." He touched his chest over his heart now, "and it hurts, it feels like it's breaking, and I can't fix it. I can't fill it. I need you guys to fill it, even Bobby." Cas sighed, "I miss our friendship, our brotherhood of sorts. I'm so damn sorry I listened to Crowley and didn't come to you, Dean. I should have."

"Aw, such a touching moment." The other Sam said, taunting them now. "Want to suck each other's dicks yet?" They all threw him a nasty look. Yeah, robo-Sam was getting on their nerves already.

They ignored the amused man and thought about what Cas had said. He'd listened to Crowley. Sam had listened to Ruby. Sure, Cas had done a worse job of it but was he so different? So _not_ worth listening to?

"You really sorry, Cas? I mean really really, 'about to run screaming from the guilt and hiding forever' kind of sorry? The 'I'll do anything if you'll just forgive me, please!' kind?" Both boys were familiar with this kind; they had felt it too much not to be.

"Yes! So damn sorry, both of you! Sorry!" Castiel pleaded, yanking the smirking unsouled Sam with him, pushing him to his knees too. "Forgive me eventually, okay? Don't hate me forever, please?"

"Damn it, Cas, we don't hate you. Want to and damn would love it if I could but, no, I don't hate you. I'm just cautious and afraid you'll betray us again." Dean admitted and Cas sighed sadly.

"Well, I don't know about him but I'm pissed but, yeah, I don't hate you. I might need time if we survive this little mind trip in my head to forgive you but, no, I don't hate you either. Still love you, man. So if you say you can fix this, then I'll try to trust you." Sam admitted as well, shrugging, "so what do I have to do…with dickhead me?"

"Kill him, reabsorb him, he is a part of you. You will not be whole again or alive again, I might add, if you don't. You don't have to like that he's a part of your memories and it may hurt to remember what he represents but we all have this part, a part of us that remembers crap we hate. I hate I listened to Crowley, and I'll always remember what I did to you guys, and hate myself for it. But it is still a part of me, like he is of you. You will regret the memories he gives you back but _damn_ it, you need them to _fix_ yourself!" Castiel begged and Sam took the gun Dean now handed him, standing over the grinning part of himself now.

"I don't want to remember you, but I will, and I know you'll hurt me whenever I do but I'll be _damned_ if I let you kill me now." Sam said harshly and shot his unsouled self in the head, twice. Light poured from the unsouled part into Sam now and was soon reabsorbed. He cringed as he remember what he'd forgotten he'd done without a soul and knew he had a lot to make up for but he did feel more complete though, so he figured Cas had been right so far. "So what now?" He looked at the sad angel and gave him a small smile, strangely feeling like he needed to make the angel feel better, less guilty now. "It's okay, Cas, I got this part. Just tell me what's next."

"This." Cas said and soon found themselves on the porch of Bobby's house but a darker, creepier version. "This part will hurt, Sam, but that's where I come in. I have to help you fix this part. I will take its pain for you and heal that pain, ease it , and you'll absorb it. I will feel the pain, not you." He knew it was the price he had to pay for his betrayal. It was the way he had to earn the forgiveness as his Father had shown him it would be.

"This is the…" Sam said softly, suddenly afraid but Cas took his hand and Dean did, too.

"Part that remembers all of your time in Hell and everything that happened there." Cas admitted, it scared even him.

They stared at the house now for a minute before Sam went in, them by his side. They got to the kitchen and saw the candles everywhere. At the table, in deep shadow, sat another him. It was hunched over and crying.

"Sam." It said, "I knew you'd come." It's voice was cracked from screaming and held great pain.

"Wait, Sam, I have to go first here." Cas said afraid but going before him, "Hold him back, Dean, I have to do this." Dean hugged Sam hard and Sam looked confused.

"What are you going to do, Cas?" Sam asked concerned, Cas's face was tragic now.

"Die for you." Cas said softly, crying now. He approached the person, touching it with his hand, he pushed healing into it while pulling all the pain and agony, and every other feeling it held in it, every bad thing it contained, softening it and fixing it while it broke him the way Sam would have if he had, if it had touched him before he did this. Cas screamed and writhed in its arms and then fell to the floor, bleeding, broken, and dying. "Absorb it now." He whispered and held on until he watched a horrified Sam grab his other self, now not broken, whole and smiling as his real self, stabbing it and reabsorbing it quickly, and marveling at how he didn't feel the flames or the breaking anymore.

But Cas did as his eyes slid shut and he burned. He was tortured, mutilated, raped and broken repeatedly by both angels in the cage; he was ripped raw and screaming only to be done so again. He screamed his pain and begged for nothing. He said nothing of the sort. He took Sam's pain and Hell and made it his own, and smiled.

Then he died.

Both boys fell on him crying begging him to wake up but to no avail. He was not alive to hear them. He sent one last thought.

"Father, it is done. Please bring them back, I cannot do it. I have done thy will. For you, For them, and most of all, for Sam. I die now but please, let this be the price paid and over for him. Let me die and let him be whole again. I am broken and dead but let my friend, my brother, Samuel Winchester, live and please, let him be free of what I take into me."

Then he knew no more and the boys cried, hugging his prone and limp form close.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Then they woke up and a dimming light flowed from Sam. It fell gently to the bed between them and settled into an even dimmer angel form again. Then it held flesh and was Castiel again. A very still Castiel. They reached over and shook the angel, screaming and crying for him to wake up! That he had done the most stupid thing this time and if he didn't come back to life right now, they'd kill him again! Which was an useless and, not to mention, redundant thought to begin with.

Castiel was dead.

Sam wasn't.

Just the way Castiel had known it would end all along.

They had Gabriel now to guide them, so they'd be okay.

He'd planned that part, too.

He'd paid for his betrayal and now he was done.

But yet the boys cried for him. Bobby cried for him. And, yes, Gabriel cried for him as well.

They went to Bobby's and built a pyre, lovingly wrapping the angel's body and soaking it with their tears of love and forgiveness, along with salt and oil. They lit the pyre after words were spoken, of love and mercy and of the forgiveness he had died for.

They all cried again and watched their friend, their dearest but misled friend, burn. And missed him so much it hurt.

Xxxxxxxxxx

"Castiel, you have done good, son." God said touching the sleeping angel, sleeping? Cas thought, angels don't sleep. "They do when they die, and I bring them back. The Hell you took inside is gone, I have erased it. It was not your Hell, son, but his. Now it is no one's. It is gone for all time. Wake up, son. We don't have much time here."

Cas woke with a start, his Father smiling kindly now at him, fingers in his hair. A smile of approval and love on his Father's face.

"I did good? Sam is fine now?" Cas said softly, sitting up with his Father's aid, hands on his shoulder and back, supporting him; Cas felt so weak now.

"He's healed. You did it right, Son. Now…we must return you to them." God said smiling.

Cas's face lit up with joy now, "I can go back? Not dead?" He wasn't dead?

"Not dead anymore. You did truly die, as Sam would have if he had taken the Hell into himself. You have only been gone hours now, and your body burns on a pyre. An honor from them to you. They have forgiven you and you have earned it. Now you must go back before your body burns all up. I can reform it from a little matter but not none. You are almost burnt up now, you must return now." God insisted and Castiel nodded happily, closing his eyes as God touched his Grace refilling him once again, "Remember your duties. Just because you are to be their guide does not excuse you from those."

"I know, I won't slack off on my duties to you or them. I promise." Castiel said as he faded to transparency now, seeing the flames on his body but not feeling them. "I'll make you proud, Father, I won't let you down."

Now he almost all there, he could see them crying, staring at him as he burned but he could still hear God speaking to him, feel his hands keeping the flames from hurting him, reforming him lovingly now until he was whole again. "I know you won't, Castiel, I've known it all along." God kissed him now, softly on the forehead and was gone.

Castiel lay whole on the pyre.

He shook off the wrappings which took a while, they were tied on tight, damn those guys had been efficient! Then he climbed down, stepping through the flames without feeling them burn or seeing them harm him in any way. He glowed so brightly, he lit the yard as if it had been day, at noon. They had been leaving then but had seen the reflected light and turned to see what it was. They stared in surprise, shock, relief, love, and, most of all, forgiveness.

Castiel felt and saw the glow fade until night returned to the yard once more and only the fire gave it light.

They ran to him and hugged him, picking him up as best they could and spinning him; happy smiles on every face now.

"But…how…you were…" Sam sputtered and Castiel shrugged.

"I knew what would happen if you got that part back. It would have killed you. I couldn't let that happen." Castiel explained feeling lighter now, his heart no longer heavy, "I had to take that part and purge that Hell from it, take it into myself, to spare you that. So instead of killing you, which I could not bear to happen, and in turn, kill Dean, I took it into myself and let it kill me."

"I love you guys, and well, I had to fix you, Sam. You didn't deserve the cage, you didn't deserve the lack of soul thing, you didn't deserve any of this mess I created. None of you did. You were my friends, like my brothers really, and you didn't deserve Hell, any of you." Castiel said smiling still, eyes on his friends; it felt so good to know that they were his friends again.

"You had no right! It was my Hell, not yours. I was mad sure, and, yes, most of this mess was your fault, but damn it, you didn't have to die to be forgiven! We'd have forgiven you soon! Hell, we already had by then anyway, truth be told." Sam shouted, upset. Another person willing to die in his place, how many loved ones did he have to kill this way? When did it end?

Castiel came over to Sam and touched his face, making him look at him now, to force him to pay attention. "Yes. Yes, I did, Sam. You are not an abomination and you two are not twisted together wrongly, not too closely tied together. I know it feels that way but it's not what you think. Yes, he died for you, went through Hell for you. Yes, Jess and your mom died, but not because of you, or for you, but because a demon would have killed them anyway, with or without you involved, Sam. Gabriel died for you guys because it was his choice, you were not responsible for that; he was. I chose to die for you this time because I knew it would save you, would save you both, Bobby, too." Castiel let go of him now and backed up, nodding, "It was my choice and I'd do it again if I had to." He smiled softly now, eyes shining with happiness again, "I love you guys, all of you. I'm sorry I betrayed you. I just want to be your friend again, no more stupid shit, promise. I got your back."

"We love you, too. Still your friends. All is forgiven. Just don't pull that shit on us again. You just listened to a demon. Things never end well when we listen to demons, never have." Dean said smiling fondly at their friend now, so glad he was okay and back. "Speaking of demons. Crowley got away. How are we going to deal with him?"

"Why, kill him of course. He knows how to find Purgatory and how to open it. I can't let that stand. Father can't either." Castiel said smiling wickedly now, "He gave you that particular job. Said he was sure you could do it."

"Well, we'd be glad to, if we could find him." Bobby said frustrated, "Bastard is dug in deeper than a tick on a dog. Can't find him even by radar." They'd tried to, with no results. The King of Hell knew how to cloak too damn well!

"Don't need to find him. Just need his bones." Castiel smiled wickedly and said, "Be right back." He popped out and came back with a burlap bag, bones thunking against each other in it. "Burn these. They're his real bones. He hid them again but I found them. Was going to use them against him eventually, never intended to give the bastard Purgatory at all."

"So you were going to double-cross him in the end? Why?" Bobby had to ask, they had made a deal for souls, why would Cas risk that ? He smiled as he knew why and so did the others.

"Because he was a demon, and no real angel, not the God loving kind nor the human loving kind would hand that kind of power over to a demon." Castiel said matter of factly. "I just wanted to stop Raphael from starting the apocalypse and roping you boys into it again but Crowley? He'd have destroyed the world and you, too. I had good intentions but good intentions weren't enough, I know that now. I was wrong and stupid and got carried away with the power. Did things I knew I shouldn't have. Fucked it all up and betrayed you to boot. I deserved my fate, but you two never did. I couldn't let him have that power or let Raphael win, because both would ended with one or both of you dead, and I couldn't bear that."

"Now, let's burn us a demon, shall we?" Castiel said and the boys nodded. They salted the bones, poured oil on them, and then tossed a match onto them, Castiel adding Holy Fire to the blaze, too. His angel senses attuned to Crowley now.

He heard the son of a bitch scream as he burned up and smiled. Gabriel followed suit. They both ;watched the bastard burn and knew that Purgatory was safe now, no one would ever find it now.

Later he pulled the others to the side and explained he had to go fulfill his new duties but he would come if they needed him. They hugged him goodbye and he smiled that crooked little smile. The same old Cas. Their dear friend Cas. They'd call him. Gabriel, too. If they needed them, like they always had in the past.

Gabriel vanished shortly after with a hug and a wave.

All was forgiven.

All prices were paid.

All debts repaid.

Everything the way it was meant to be.

Cas watched over the boys and Bobby.

Gabriel watched over the boys and Bobby, too.

Bobby watched over them all.

The boys watched over Bobby.

And God?

Well, he watched over them all,

And he smiled proudly.

xxxxxxxxxx


End file.
